I try to avoid watching too much TV. It would be so easy to become a total couch potato in prison because there is so little to do. The TV is an easy way for time to pass but 90% of the content is unwholesome and I really do think it can be damaging to our attitudinal health.

Having said that, there are a few things that I am slightly embarrassed to admit that I watch. One of them is “Dogs Behaving (Very) Badly” on Channel 5. The dog expert guy on there is called Graeme and he is brilliant in knowing how to communicate with dogs to create certain behavioural tendancies.

Of course dogs can recognise certain words but tone of voice seems to be more important when creating a temperament. Speaking nicely and calmly creates a nice and calm dog, speaking harshly and aggressively creates a harsh and aggressive dog.

“Why, oh why,” you may be wondering, “is NaN writing about Dogs Behaving (Very) Badly?” Well, if we know that skilful communication can also create appropriate temperament in animals, why hasn’t the SPS yet realised that skilful communication can also create appropriate temperaments in prisoners?

I guess it’s an extension of the argument that if you treat people like animals, they will become animals. Maybe it’s a chicken and egg type question but which comes first, a prisoner behaving like an animal or a prisoner being treated like an animal. Whichever way around it is, the outcome is the same – this prisoner re-enters society as an animal and the SPS bears the responsibility.

I once asked a guard, “what de-escalation training do you get?” He told me they received none. At the time, I was really surprised but the more I watch the behaviour of the guards, the more I believe it is true.

As a thought experiment, what would happen if all of those dogs who are behaving (very) badly came into the “care” of the SPS and all of the prisoners were treated by Graeme the dog man? So if those aggressive Alsatians, lazy Labradors and bad Bulldogs were locked in a small box for 23 hours a day, fed the cheapest food, access limited to loved ones and physical activity almost totally removed? I’m sure we can imagine the result.

And what would the effect be on the other prisoners of being with people who actually care, who are reflective on their practice and have a genuine desire to achieve good outcomes? I’m sure we can all imagine the result of that, too.

Right, I’d better go. Someone has just flung open my door and barked “Feeding time” so I’d better take my bowl and make like Oliver Twist. I wonder what Mr Bumble will be like tonight.

NaN.